Totally Fake News Here
Thu Sep 26 2019
UNITED STATES- There was a time in history when there was not a whole lot in the way of musical instruments. If you couldn't find a drum to beat, sometimes your best bet was to whistle. But what if you can't? What if your mouth is fashioned in such a way that you can't produce a whistle, and the best sound you can manage sounds like you are wheezing?
So many years ago, humans invented all manner of whistles. Devices which, as their name implies, allow a person to make a wide variety of whistling sounds.
For some unspecified reason, this week there has been an upsurge in the popularity of these devices. Major stock advice firms are reporting that there has been a spike in value for Whistle futures.
This comes as a surprise to most people because we don't normally think something so common and mundane could suddenly become so important. But the evidence can't be denied. We all like whistles, whether they are the comedic slide whistle, or the ones popularly used by traffic cops. So this really shouldn't be a surprise.
And it's not just consumers... Popular job boards are posting many positions for people who are looking to make a living as a whistleblower. Indeed alone has 173 jobs currently posted.
So if you are looking for a change of careers, you could actually land a job where that consists entirely of blowing whistles. And we aren't just talking about referees, although they have been popularly known as some of the greatest whistleblowers. You could work for corporations, and governments too!
Evidently, it is a very important job, for some reason. Presumably we will know sometime very soon just why this whole thing has been in the news so much lately.
Scientists Make Viruses More Friendly
Nik's next stunt is going to be out of this world
Our response is sure to be super effective